One funny occurrence ---

     One of the clerics in my party went to an inn that also provided
companionship for the night, either preference. When he got his
bedmate, he and she had a little fun. (the encounter lasted 10 minutes
game time, heh,heh). Afterward, they did it again, and this time it
lasted 1 hr. 15 min., with him fainting at the end.  When he woke up,
he found himself in a cell, and the woman nowhere to be seen.
     It turns out that a woman named the White Lich had been taking out
potential enemies throughout the kingdom (she is a LICH). It also
turned out that it wasn't "white" lich, but "wight" lich.
     Imagine my player's face when he realized he had screwed a wight
lich!!!

                                                  --- Larry

Learning about true love ---

     Mowahpehnoksie (Mo), Plainsman warrior (my character) was on a
quest (solo) for a lost plainsman treasure.  The first part of the
quest was the creation of a sacred bundle, the tribal shaman told Mo
that he had to acquire a lock of hair from his one true love as an
ingredient in the sacred bundle. As it turned out Mo had a "one true
love" in the person of Vasquez, an elven privateer/warrior of
extraordinary beauty and sword skill. Mo had been chasing Vasquez for a
long time, all to no avail. She kept telling him that she would marry
him when he could beat her in a duel. No one had ever beaten her in a
duel. Anyhow, Mo sets off for the city where Vasquez was docked. First
he checks at the Bloody Blade, a tavern partially owned by Vasquez, the
bartender says she is down on the docks talking to her crew (of
cutthroats). Mo goes to the docks, the first mate says that she just
left and said she would be back in a few days. A disappointed Mo goes
back to the tavern to leave a message, but the bartender tells him that
Vasquez just came in and went up to her rooms. Mo goes up there and
gets invited in. Vasquez is wearing a robe, and has a full bath of
water drawn, she dumps Mo into the water, one thing leads to another...
     When Mo wakes up, Vasquez is standing by the window, she turns
says "Tyche sends her regards" changes into her true form, a succubus
and teleports away. Tyche was an old enemy of the adventurers that had
heard about Mo's quest, and wanted to set him up. Mo eventually found
Vasquez at her father's castle where he had to explain what had
happened, and see if she would still give him her hair (she did, taking
pity on the fool). To make a long story short, Mo passed through many
more trials, and succeeded in the quest. The succubus in the scenario
had been careful to control her draining abilities while with Mo,
because the real reason for all the subterfuge was delivered to Mo
roughly nine months later, a bouncing baby alu-demon. What is the moral
of this story? Don't have pre-marital sex? No, then what? Shapechanging
creatures can make for very interesting bed partners.
     NOTE: Mo and Vasquez were eventually married, and are raising
their alu-demon daughter as best they can. Vasquez has more or less
forgiven Mo for the whole thing, and even helped rescue the kid when
she was kidnapped. They are in semi retirement until Soah is old enough
to take care of herself. They are very happy to have weaned her off of
eating raw meat.

                                                  --- John Daniel

Prostitutes are nasty ---

     Our group of four entered a real sleazy town, it was basically a
pirates' cove town where pirates, thugs, and assorted baddies resided
when they weren't attacking, raping, and pillaging the neighborhood.
The group of us (myself a monk, a fighter, cleric, and mage) were
searching for the whereabouts of a lady kidnapped from a prominent
merchant from our hometown whom we owed favors too for past help. The
trail at this point led to this town where he (the supposed ring
leader of the kidnappers) had been known to frequent. Of course, none
of the "regulars" there wanted anything to do with a bunch of strangers
coming in and we were getting nowhere. Of course, my character wanted
nothing to do with this place and considered the whole area to be
respite with creeps. Our fighter though was a big burlesque guy and
found the prostitution there to be a wonderful, wonderful place. Our
cleric (who being female had a rough time with the people of the area)
basically stuck by my side and the two of us spent more time searching
for the damn fighter than getting information on the kidnapping. Of
course, he struck it rich with a talkative hooker and found that the
person we were looking for was holdup in the harbor on a boat.
     Eventually we snuck down there, boarded and captured the criminal,
rescued the lady, then had to battle our way back out. Altogether, we
were hounded by:
     a) the criminal's pals
     b) some other rouges who were smitten by our lovely cleric and
        wanted her for their own
     c) two separate prostitutes who say they are carrying our fighters
        child (They can't both be, can they? It must be a scam, at
        least HE says so...)
     d) the "ladies'" pals and family who both insist on marriage or
        financial reimbursements for what he did to these poor ladies
 

     Well, we made it out fine. Returned to our hometown where we're
sort of hero's now, but in danger whenever we leave. Ahhh... what a
life adventurers leave.
     THE MORALE: Don't let a fighter run rampant in a sleazy town
filled with lots of lovely prostitutes.

                                                  --- Toa the monk

A cleric's penance ---

     Although our group engaged in sexual encounters (old favorites
like the innkeeper's daughter, the farmer's wife, etc.), it usually
had severe consequences. After the treatment of one character, a
cleric, the group stayed clear of these opportunities.
     This character, a cleric, was seduced by a bar wench during one of
our stops. Although the sex was supposedly great, soon after the cleric
began to notice a tingling sensation in his groin. Sure enough, his
deity had struck him with a venereal disease, and no spell could take
it off! The condition became more debilitating until finally, after
intense prayer, his god forgave him as long as a certain penance was
followed. This involved the usual series of prayers, and one extra
condition: on the ground there magically appeared a bag of holding
(usable only for the purpose it was intended), and inside was a large
supply of BURLAP UNDERWEAR! There was enough for the cleric to change
three times daily, which, of course, he was required to do! We all
steered clear of barmaids after that!

                                                  --- Mario R. Borelli

A Barbarian's Boo-Boo ---

     Our adventuring group was exploring a keep of some type looking
for the main baddie who was female. When we found her bedroom, she
wasn't there. Of course, we began looking through it when one of the
male barbarian PC's (played by a female) accidently spilled some
perfume on himself which had strange properties. The Barbarian and the
elven female mage (played by a male) had a certain sudden
uncontrollable urge to make use of the nearby bed (that lasted for
about 2 hours game time not real time). By this time everyone was
laughing hysterically because their characters were standing outside
the open door and were watching the entertainment. Now after everyone
stopped laughing (and who wouldn't
with a low level barbarian and a mid-level mage going at it) the GM had
asked questions and rolled his dice and wouldn't ya just know that the
mage got pregnant (snicker).
     What made the whole thing so interesting was mainly the fact that
the characters are both opposite gender from their players (and the
mage doesn't really know she's pregnant yet).
     The GM used The Complete Guide to Unlawful Carnal Knowledge to
make the whole tower and adventure. The GM kept flippin' through and
referring to the guide.

                                                  --- Xandar

Precise Constitution Points ---

     I'd like to tell you about my character (at least, the one for
whom this guide is good, since I'm playing at least two characters at
any given moment, but that's another story). He is an Elf fighter/bard
that due to becoming undead and being resurrected lost 1 Constitution
point from his original 11. He asked to return to life (you won't
believe it) because he fell in love with a Druid. Due to his chaotic
nature, he did some nasty things later (like tempting the police-chief
for a gain of about 300 gold pieces...) and had a lover-fight with the
druid, but as he apologized to her and did everything he could to
please her - they are back together again, and then what? Just as we
leave the city, towards the castle that contains a sword and a horse
dedicated for the paladin in out party by his god, we meet three(!)
meduses!!!! And guess who's becoming a stone on the spot? Yes, me!!!
(The other me is a holly-ghost, an undead lawful-good priest of the God
of the Sun (I know it sounds crazy) and he is protected by him, so he
only got paralyzed in another meduse attack). However, one of my best
friends, a vampire magic user (would you please repeat THAT???!!!)
succeeded in using him vampiric abilities and use a higher level
vampire mage to cast stone-to-flesh on me. He did that three times,
'cause I failed the system shock twice... So, and here we get to our
point, I'm left with a Constitution of 7!!! (I still have a Dexterity
of 19 and Strength of 17, but I LOVE having sex!!!) ARGHHHHHHH!!!!!!
Since my GM makes me, as a bard, write and sing REAL songs for my
spells (I need no spell-books or material components - just a suitable
song), I am announcing my next spell-song, which I hope to complete by
next session: Luwain's Ever Lasting Hard-On!
     Lately, the Fellowship has found itself at Salba-the Layer of
Momentary Pleasure (this is a part of the Layered World, an anomaly
located in the Mirn-Kaia Universe, where sex is a requirement for all
visitors, and the local monetary unit is one Orgasm (four Orgasms =
Multiple Orgasm). The local dominant race, the Salbars, can (and do)
grasp momentary sexual pleasure as a physical object in the fabric of
Time (in Mirn-Kaia metaphysical terms, Salba is related to the Sphere
of Time in a passive way). The job of the second species of Salba, the
Timplags, and of all visitors, is to provide sexual divertissement and
new experience to the Salbars. As can be imagined, this did give a rise
to a lot of really good role-playing. And the bard Luwain, remaining
faithful to himself, has sneaked away from the party and remained in
Salba, in the bed of no less than Salibu, the Mistress of the Layer.

                                                  --- Luwain

A Cleric's Vow ---

     I've been in a party with a very complex character. He was a
powerful cleric, who had entered clerichood as a sort of escape from
his sexuality. He took a vow of chastity of his own accord (his deity
certainly didn't care so long as he was a good, faithful cleric).
     Once, he was put into no win/no win situation. The only person who
could help him was a evil female mage who found him, and his resistance
to her many charm, very appealing. Needless to say, the cleric, in
order to achieve the good and righteous end, offered himself up.
     He stills plays in my world, and now has the terrible guilt (which
I use to my advantage) about his poor, illegitimate child, who being
raised by an evil mother, may come back to haunt old dad some day.  He
is actually an excellent character and is very clever when around those
hearty fighters going out on the town.... you know the type. From a
GMing perspective, I'd have to say, there's not much difference... it's
all in how good a roleplayer they are!

                                                  --- Bertnof

Cassandra Gets A Friend ---
 

    I now play a psionicist named Cassandra Wissenkunstler, raised from
infancy as an orphan by a group of priestesses at a monastery devoted
to Areya, goddess of Time and Prophecy. I put in her character
background that this had caused her to be celibate so that none of the
other players' characters (all male) would stand a chance of scoring
with her, but last gaming session - well... I guess I'd better let her
tell you.
     Cassandra, a slim girl (5'5", 113# only 17), steps forward,
seeming a little nervous. "I feel easier talking to a group of
strangers about this, for I know not what my companions or my
priestesses would say, and I fear what my goddess might do were she to
discover what has happened.
     "Two months ago, while taking a midday meal at the Blue Boar, a
most interesting incident occurred. My server was Camillia, a most
attractive girl [17 Comeliness], and while refilling my mug of ale, she
chanced to spill some in my lap. She apologized profusely, and quickly
began drying my robes with her cleaning rags. Her light touch, as she
rubbed the cloth on my inner thighs, sparked a desire in me I have
never known before; and when our eyes met I saw the same hunger in her.
'I would do anything to make it up to you,' Camillia whispered. I told
her I would like her to make it up that night, and she suggested the
residence of Lady Rebecca, where she lived.
    "In the arms of Camillia and Lady Rebecca I learned what true
pleasure is, and was taught how fingers, lips, and tongue might repay
the pleasures I was given." She blushes and falls silent.
    Well, since Cassandra can't finish, I'll do it for her. Suffice it
to say that the rest of the guys in the gaming group were jealous as
hell, but since everyone was on "solo" adventures for the night, none
of the other characters found out about it for two full months of game
time.
     During that interval, Lady Rebecca began calling Cassandra
"Clarissa," and my character learned from Camillia that this was
actually Rebecca's daughter, whom the lady had hacked to pieces and
buried under the cellar when she tried to flee her lesbian mother.
Camillia had stayed on out of a combination of fear and love for the
older woman, and due to Lady Rebecca's strong personality (save vs.
charm with a +4 bonus). I also learned that Rebecca was something of a
dominatrix, who routinely bound both Camillia and Cassandra in order to
playfully whip them and "tease" them with leather-wrapped wooden, shall
we say, "implements."
     Finally we (the gaming group) were getting together to leave town
on an adventure, except that Lady Rebecca didn't want her precious
"new" Clarissa to leave her. I went ectoplasmic in the middle of the
night (scared poor Camillia nearly to death) and got out, only to find
the thief of the party coming to check up on me. I quickly covered
myself by saying that I had been held captive by Rebecca (sure, with
the ability to escape ectoplasmically?) and telling him of the
implements of torture and the body under the house.
     The thief and one of our fighters returned the next night in order
to steal a couple of whips and "implements" as evidence against her,
which my character then took to the guards, claiming to have escaped
with them. When I told the guards of the body, they marched to the
house, dug up the skeleton, and summarily executed Lady Rebecca for the
crime of murder. Camillia was freed, for they determined that she had
been virtually "enslaved" upon fear of her life, and possession of the
house reverted to her.
     Now she and my character are living there together (except when
the group is adventuring), and the other characters in our group are
trying hard to help me cope with the awful ordeal of extended captivity
and rape I've had to endure (men, they'll believe anything a woman
tells them while shaking with terror and crying big crocodile tears).
 

                                                  --- Kenneth Nuckols
 
 

David Kelman for his spell Sacremon's Emperor's New Clothes.

Sven De Kerpel for his comments and additions on the prostitute section
of the guide which resulted in seven major chances to the tables to
make them more realistic and playable.

Steve Langton for the "Prostitutes are nasty" story in the story
section.

Tim Larson for inspiring the Skilled Perversion NWP.

Lonadar the Wanderer bringing up the race question, commenting on a lot
of the spells, adding the feather to the components of Leomund's Ting
Brothel.

Luwain "Don't Fuck With Me" The Nightingale of The Fellowship of the
Flying Paladin for the Precise Constitution Points story.  He created
the A Bard's Sexual Spell-Songs section and contributed "Luwain's Ever
Lasting Hard-On" to it.

Andrew Lohmann for his Induce Pleasure Psionic Power.

Mark Manning for his Teeney-Weeny-Bikini magic item.

John M. Martz for his criticisms on the pregnancy rules and his
clerical spells: Baltasar's Impediment, Fertility.

Mizar, the Brilliant for assinting in the creation of the section
"The Baby is Here! What Ya' Got?"

Nige for his Sexual Phobia insanity.

Hugo M. Nijhof who made a list of spells from which I took and modified
the spells Don Juan's Irresistible Kiss and Vampiric Kiss.

Kenneth Nuckols for his "Cassandra Gets A Friend" story in the story
section.

The Anti-Paladin, Nomed the Accursed for his abyss level in the section
An Abyss Level.

Nosferatu for The Rack Critical Hit Chart: For Men Only.

Mike Parasich for the spells Cure Soreness, Enchant Condom, Delay
Orgasm, Deep Throat, Power Word: Disrobe; all of which were mentioned.

The Phantom for the Alternative Sexist Height & Weight rule in the baby
section.

Arron Sher, compiler of The NET.PLOTS.BOOK from which the vampire
adventuring idea came from.

Sir Gregor creator of The Bobitt Maneuver.

Scott Spetalnik for seeing that a bell curve wasn't used with the
ability scores.

Matt Sullivan for his humble comments and recommendations that inspired
a few modifications to the rules. For the first draft of "Seduction:
More Than Reaction Roles" section, which was very creative.

Eredae Swiftblade for the alternate conception system "Conception:
System II".

Tony for the in the Homosexual Plots section: Evil of Homosexuality.

Train, GM for the following ideas in the Homosexual Plots section: The
Gay Man and the Jealous Wife; Saying No; Land of Fairies, Literally;
and Reverse Rape.

Mark H. Vest for his magical item the Girdle of Hippolyte.

Vinnie & Rahasia Mage Priestess of Ishtar The Priestess of Love for
ReErection spell idea and suggesting a spell that simulates the
Nereid's kiss. For keeping them comments coming on everything I needed
help on. Plus, he suggested wisdom modifiers for the Houri seduction
rules which were implemented. For additions to the sexual knowledge
skill. For the "Adventuring Idea" section and three ideas (Love Boat,
Dog Man Needs A Date, Twins) that appear there.  For the idea and
suggestions for Rahasia's Whirlpool Tub Of Love which appears in the
magic-items section.

Owen Winkler for a first draft of the impotence spell that I used.

Xandar for his story "A Barbarian's Boo-Boo" in the story section of
the guide.

Following a strange and perverse discussion on the a RPG discussion
list, the section "Protection of the Worst Kind (for the Male)" was
created based on the following persons' comments: Rod and Kenneth
Nuckols.

Following a role-playing discussion on the a RPG discussion list, the
section "Has Anyone Played a Homosexual Character?" was created based
on the following persons' comments: Andy Trembley, Geoffrey Wyen,
Akira, Scott Spetalnik, Gyorgy Schadt, Russ Fontaine, Andrew Hackard.

Following a role-playing discussion on the a RPG discussion list, the
section "ESSAY: What If A Character Rapes A NPC?" was created based on
the following persons' comments: Felix Leadfingers, Kalindra
Nightstalker aka Michelle Carter, and Paul .

After the first release of the guide, I recieved a message from Rob:
     What would pregnancy do to a theif's skills? What about a mage or
     bard?  We decided that there was no good set rule but that they
     would be greatly affected.
This led to a large conversation on the a RPG about pregnancy. The main
contibution to the conversation was Vicki L. Domansky, Morgaine. Some
major comments, suggestions, and ideas came from John M. Martz. John
"Nightwind" Boelter made some great comments, suggestions, and ideas as
well as Morgan Blackheart of The Chaotic Realm and his wife. Others
were: Bob Smith, Paul Duggan, Paul J. Cummings, Joe, Lord Baylor
Ironsbane, Brian David Phillips, Philippe Goujard the FAQ Dude.